By now, I’m sure you’ve heard the claims. Standing desks can boost productivity, ease your back pain, help you burn more calories and even improve your mental health. Those benefits are great, but they’re really just the tip of the iceberg. Beneath the surface lies a whole world of ways your desk can work to your benefit.
Read the following ideas below to transform the way you work and the way your desk works for you.
1. Hide Your Non-Work-Related Browsing
Have an annoying office mate who’s always looking over your shoulder when you’re trying to use valuable company time to browse Amazon? The answer to this problem is hidden in your height adjustable desk. Simply raise or lower your desk out of their sight et voila. You can expect to gain 30-45 minutes more browsing time per workday.
2. Dog-Proof Dining Table
Almost everyone wants to work from home but no one thinks of the hidden dangers of having a canine coworker. Remote workers using a traditional desk report an alarming number of stolen lunches every year. To combat this, we suggest eating your lunch with your desk in the standing position. You’ll burn more calories while eating and the safety of your kale salad will not be a concern.
3. Measure Your Child’s Height
Pencil marks on the wall are for people who don’t have a digital height display on their desks. Many standing desks have the option to attach a handset that displays the exact height of your tabletop in inches. Get an accurate height reading by raising or lowering your desk equal to the height of your child. Then, log your child’s height into a spreadsheet and share the file with them. How else will they be able compare their growth rate with their sibling’s?
4. Squatting Coach
Feeling that midday slump? Researchers have found that getting your heart pumping at work periodically can boost productivity and keep you in better shape. You can incorporate squatting into your office workout routine by setting your high and low squatting heights on your handset. You can save your height setting to make sure you’re working hard. Doing this will leave you wondering if the looks you’re getting around the office are for your high tech desk or for your glutes.
5. Mock “Chair People”
It seems like so long ago to you now, but once you were a chair person. You and your spine spent hours at your desk in discomfort, just waiting for the right desk to come along. Now you wear athletic shoes to the office and you want everyone to know why. And you know what? That’s ok. Your coworkers don’t hate you, they hate their back pain.
6. Appear Taller to Your Coworkers
Speaking of chair people, you better get used to literally looking down on them. By standing most of the day, everyone will think you’re taller...and you know what that means: automatic dibs on the spacious front seat every time you all go to lunch. It won’t be until you convince one of them to get a standing desk that they’ll realize they’ve been deceived.
7. Attach Casters For a Multi-Use Surface
Every time you place your coffee cup, write a paper or pile clutter on another surface, your standing desk sheds a single tear. That tear falls to the ground and waters a tiny caster seed from which grows four rolling casters. These casters are carefully harvested and, if the crop yields are sufficient, are made available to the public. Once purchased, they can be attached to your desk’s feet to create a portable, height adjustable surface suitable for almost any purpose. With the ability to move your standing desk around your home, there’s no need to keep any other furniture like kitchen counters or a dining table.
8. Create the Perfect Vanity Table
You’re not going to apply your makeup without making a 10-minute tutorial video and promoting 10 different brands are you? I didn’t think so. Your standing desk can easily transform into an all-in-one vlog making machine. Easily keep your lights plugged in and cameras charged up with an integrated power strip. Stow your cables and need for validation away in a cable tray. Then, find the perfect desk height to make your jawline look strong AF and you’ll be instafamous in no time!
9. Find Your Optimal Kissing Height
Is there a considerable height difference between you and your partner? Simply sit on the surface of your standing desk and raise or lower the surface to your lovers lips with the touch of a button. It’s a super convenient way to stay connected. Not just to your partner, but to your devices which will be plugged in next to you, so if you get bored of smooching you can easily scroll through facebook.
10. Clean Hard to Reach Areas
No ladder? No problem! Sit securely on your desktop and raise your desk high enough to reach the colony of spider webs in the corners of your bedroom, or the dust that has accumulated on your ceiling fan since the beginning of Summer.
*Please note that standing desk have weight limits. Always check yours before placing yourself or anything else on your desk. Parts of this article are satirical - it is not recommended to sit or stand on your desk*